Being a Family is... Part 2

Part 2 of my series about what being in a family means to me. You can read the first part here.


Being a Family Is...Creating.
My family is homeschooled; homeschoolers are naturally pretty creative because our lifestyle encourages a creative attitude. But even more that, my family is, how shall we say it, beyond creative.
When I was three I got a  beautiful wooden dollhouse, but I didn't have any furniture to put inside of it. Mama sat me down at the kitchen table one day and we made furniture out of plastic lids, popsicle sticks, and tiny mugs out of beads and macaroni. Later on when I was thirteen I made an entire dollhouse out of cardboard boxes, and five rooms full of furniture and accessories right down to the a roll of toilet paper in the bathroom. When we kids were little mom let us build elaborate tents in the living room, and when dad got involved they usually involved the entire room and some string. Those tents would last for days. We've made Christmas ornaments, snowmen out of coffee creamer bottles, and little Christmas cabins out of wooden sticks. We've built playhouses in the backyard. I've sewn costumes, my siblings build insane Lego creations. Our Lincoln Log forts are works of art. My mom can go into the kitchen and create mouthwatering meals just by feeling it out, no recipes involved. My dad and older brother can build amazing websites and things online. The fact of the matter is, we love to create, and I believe families were designed to create, the very structure of a family is built to nurture creativity.

Yeah, it kinda goes without saying that Phineas and Ferb are some of our heroes. I mean, who wouldn't love these guys? They are some of the coolest characters out there, and their show is hilarious! Have I memorized their hit song, "Bow Chicka Bow Wow"? What do you think?


Being a Family is...Laughing.
Laughter. Pure, beautiful, bubbly laughter is straight from heaven. I have gotten more than my share living in my family. Strong families laugh together all the time, even when things are hard, or some of the members are angry, families need to laugh together. I've gone through my share of hard times, I still am, but throughout all of my life, some of my favorite memories have involved those when I was laughing with my family. Everyone in our family has a slightly different sense of humor, sarcasm for some, slapstick for others, clever comments, or puppies sliding on a kitchen floor (guilty). We all are very witty, from the eight year old on up, I think I mentioned in my previous post that this was a direct result of talking too much. ;)


My mom and dad used to tell us stories before bed a lot. We had two different series of stories. Mom's was Richard, Susan, and Busbee (pronounced Biz-bee). They were three dogs who lived with a very rich woman called, "The Master". Susan was sensible and feminine, Richard had been taken in off of the streets and was more rough around the edges. Busbee was a baby (Mom used the cutest baby voice that still tickles me when I think about it), he got his name because he was always a busy bee. They often went on adventures, and Busbee or Richard would get them into trouble that was always hilarious. There was this one story in particular that involved eating spoiled food out of a restaurant dumpster and a cat passing out that still leaves me in stiches every time I think about it.


My dad's series was called "Muller and Carmichael". They were two ugly, decorative turtles we owned that a few of the younger ones had gotten from the dollar store for mom on her birthday one year. She named them after her favorite missionaries, George Muller, and Amy Carmichael. Dad turned these plain, ugly little turtles into objects of endearment with his stories. Mueller was the adventurous one, he would propose an idea that the sensible and reluctant Carmichael would object to. But inevitably they would end up in trouble. Driving the tractor, accidentally attaching themselves to fireworks and ending up at Grandpa's house, sneaking into the freezer to eat turtle sundae, accidentally emailing the kids' Christmas lists to all of Dad's coworkers. The things those turtles did while we all slept.

I love laughing with my family, especially when I have had a hard day or week. I think if more people enjoyed their families enough to laugh with them, the world would be a better place.

Being a Family Is... Part 1

I live in a big family, six kids, two parents. Granted, we're not the Duggers, but to an average American household, we are pretty large. Seriously, you should see the stares we have gotten when strangers see our fifteen passenger van pull up. They halt and watch the train of kids getting out of the back, unable to leave until the last kid is out, then they kind of shake their heads and move on. Knowing that I have an audience when I am getting out of my family vehicle has forced me to learn how to exit in a very ladylike fashion, so, yeah, not all bad.


I have lived in my family for eighteen years now, and I think after years of agonizing, asking questions, praying, and probing the depths with my inquisitive mind, I have finally grasped the tip of the iceberg on what a family is. So here it goes, this is one girl's idea of what a family is...




Being a Family Is Talking...a LOT!
Ever seen the Brady Bunch? You know those super chaotic scenes where all of the children are talking at once, and the parents are desperately trying to make sense of it? Yeah, that totally happens all of the time. From the moment you have more than one child and all of them can talk you begin conversation wars where everyone is attempting to talk at the same time. The conversations can range from, knock knock jokes, the best way to take out a burgler (thanks to little brothers), why glitter and playdough are both acceptable, no, necessary substances (go team glitter!), music, politics, Hallmark Channel dramas, what so and so said on Twitter, when can we put up the Christmas décor (yes, I know it's September, who cares), the technical pattern of Yoda's speech, why Captain America is better than Thor, the latest from HonestToddler, and so forth. In the end someone usually looks like this.



Exhausting as these conversations are, they have groomed me and my siblings a lot. We are very funny people (other's words, not just mine ;), we can talk to any age group, and are actually pretty decent at improv games.


Being in a Family Is Being LOUD!
This seemed like an appropriate subject to move into considering the previous one. I'm just gonna shoot straight from the hip and say it, my family is loud. Some members more than others, obviously, but we are loud. We laugh loudly, many of us listen to music (yeah, that Austin and Ally soundtrack was me, no shame) my younger brothers get deeply involved in their Battlefield games to the point where I believe I may have gotten singed eyebrows from a nearby explosions.



Yeah, we may need to tone it down sometimes, ok, a lot of the time, but I have come to accept that being in a family, at least, my family, often means being loud. And when I am alone, I find it far too quiet. As loud as it gets around here, at least that noise means that I am surrounded by people I love.


Being in a Family Is Forgiving, ALL THE TIME!
It starts with siblings destroying block towers. It get's deeper over time. He hurt my feelings, she is ignoring me, he doesn't understand me. Parents have to forgive their children for saying hurtful things to them. Children have to forgive their parents for making mistakes, and vice versa. The idea of a family is that you have a group of imperfect beings who are bound in this close circle where they have to constantly interact, be given the choice of doing right and wrong, and treat others as Christ would want them too. News flash, imperfect beings, that ain't happening all of the time. And so you find yourself in the position of having to forgive someone, yet again.



Seven times seventy times people, and most of the forgiving you have to do in your life will be in your family.

The Maze Runner- Movie Review

(Warning, Spoilers)

Thomas is deposited in a community of boys after his memory is erased, soon learning they're all trapped in a maze that will require him to join forces with fellow "runners" for a shot at escape.

I went and saw this movie with my older brother last night. Warning, if someone you know is pushed outside of their comfort zone with the intensity of Captain America 2, then they should not watch this movie. I think I probably breathed only every other minute the whole time I was watching it.


Honestly, I loved the movie. It has that theme that we find in Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, Marvel, and Hunger Games (which I have not seen but heard and read a lot about). That theme of a small, but highly committed group who are fighting against insurmountable odds to find freedom, purpose, truth, a better future, etc. Only in this movie all of that is heightened by the fact that none of the characters remember anything about the outside world or themselves beyond their own names.


The boys who were previously in the Maze welcome Thomas when he arrives, panicked and confused. They show him the ropes of how life works in "The Glade", their small square oasis where they live and grow their food inside of the massive walls of the Maze. Everyone has their own assignments, and they all follow 3 simple rules. Do your part, don't hurt anyone, and DON'T go into the Maze unless you are a Maze Runner. The Maze Runners are a group of the strongest, fastest boys in the group who go out every day when the gates to the Maze open at sunup and run the Maze in an attempt to map it and find a way out. And if you are a Maze Runner, you have to be back by sundown, or face a night alone in the Maze and certain death by the monstrous Grievers that roam it at night.


When Thomas arrives he doesn't do a very good job of "staying in the rules". He's curious, he's driven, he even breaks the rules and manages to survive a night in the Maze with two fellow runners. Eventually most of the boys recognize that he is different, that he is changing things, and that he may be their only way out. In a sense, he is the only hope they have had for 3 years.


I found several aspects of this movie fascinating, and found some neat parallels between this story and life. The boys live in a self sustaining society. They built their own houses, grow their own food, and every time a new boy is sent up to them in the elevator box they receive supplies. They found a way to coexist, they have almost what some people might call a "Utopia". It certainly is natural and down to earth, literally, you would think that those boys would wash their faces now and then. Men. ;)


Some of the boys, Will Poulter's character, Gally, in particular are fine to leave things the way they are. Life isn't so bad, and if they try to do anything differently usually someone dies, leave things the way they are and we all survive. But Thomas recognizes that there must be something more to this, they don't belong here, there has to be something more. This morning I was rehashing the movie over in my mind and recognizing that's what I loved about Thomas's character. He was willing to go against the popular opinion because he knew that he was made for something better, that this couldn't be all that there was, and he would rather die trying to get out of the Maze then spend the rest of his life living a lie. Thomas almost represents a person in life who recognizes that life here on earth isn't enough, it's not the ultimate goal, and there has to be something more.


Because Thomas is so devoted to seeking answers and an escape, he actually is able to find a way out. Sounds simple huh? Not really, it is so much more complicated, bloodier, and more agonizing than that. And if you think you are going to get some closure at the end of the movie, forget it Buster, you have now signed a contract on your soul that you must return to watch the sequel, because there was no closure, just more secrets, more questions, and a bigger battle to win.


My other favorite aspect of this movie was the characters themselves. There weren't too many changes in the scenery, it was pretty much either the Glade, or the Maze itself. But the characters are what gave this movie color, vigor, and life.


Thomas (Dylan O'Brien) was brilliantly portrayed as being passionate, he felt things deeply, he was curious, he was driven. I could almost see the wheels turning in his brain when I looked into his eyes. He was courageous and handsome, but humble. I haven't enjoyed a character of the teenage group that much in a long time.


Alby (Aml Ameen), the boy who has been there the longest, the leader, almost the father figure of the group. He felt things deeply, because these were his boys. He was instantly warm, likeable and charming.


Newt (Thomas Brodie-Sangster) He reminded me of Skandar Keynes (Edmund Pevensie) and Peter Pan rolled into a very kind, intelligent boy. He was friendly, forgiving, and let's not forget that great accent and super cute nose.


Minho (Ki Hong Lee) The very handsome head of the Maze Runners. At first he seemed incredibly stoic and not very approachable, but once you got to know him you saw him for what he was, a normal kid with a huge weight on his shoulders. He had skills, and he and Thomas really bonded after a night in the Maze together. He is definitely someone I would want by my side if I was in this story.


Chuck (Blake Cooper) Sweet and due to his age, much more of a child than the others, this gave him a trusting innocence that I think really appealed to Thomas. Thomas felt very protective of Chuck, and Chuck responded by a deep admiration of Thomas.


Gally (Will Poulter) I was thrilled to see a familiar face, particularly since its been so long since a new Narnia film was released (not much longer to wait fans!). Poulter did his part very well as Gally, a boy who had been there a long time, seen a lot of boys die, and didn't want to upset the balance of life. He opposed Thomas the most, with some pretty serious consequences. You were angry at Gally's choices, but you didn't hate him, you ached for him, he was clearly a good boy who had lost hope and the will to try to escape. Applause on Poulter's American accent, well done sir, well done.


Theresa (Kaya Scodelario) The girl who gets sent up in the elevator box a few days after Thomas' arrival with a note that says, "She's the last one". Theresa had a depth in her face that meant one look and you knew you could trust her. She jumped right into the situation with vigor, brains, and common sense. She wasn't my favorite character, but she certainly owned her part very well.


This movie definitely took me by surprise, but I am glad that I went to see it. I would recommend it to anyone over 13 (this may vary person to person) who enjoys a good adrenaline rush in a movie. I cannot wait for the next one.

Inspirational Quotes- Tolkien/C.S.Lewis (Glimpses of Eden)

There are some authors out there that we all recognize as being masters of their craft. Quite obviously, C.S. Lewis and J.R.R. Tolkien are among the finest.

I have so many C.S. Lewis quotes that I adore, it would be hard to find a favorite. But I do have a favorite Tolkien quote (for now :)

We all long for Eden, and we are constantly glimpsing it; our whole nature at its best and least corrupted, its gentlest and most human, is still soaked with the sense of exile

 I read this quote and it instantly registered with me, I have felt this way before. Haven't you ever experienced a moment when you felt an aching longing? Where you felt like you caught a glimpse of a rare and beautiful treasure? Or perhaps you had a moment when you felt like you were given a glimpse into a beautiful kingdom where everything is brighter and more beautiful? I have been taken unawares by that feeling so many times, and whenever I feel it, I get a sense of deep longing for the place where I really belong. I don't even always consciously recognize it, all I know is, that for that moment, I truly know I am not of this world and I belong somewhere else.

C.S. Lewis, another master author and Tolkien's dear friend, described having this feeling as a child. He describes a moment in his childhood when he was staring down into a little fairy garden that his brother was showing him. Something about the way the light fell upon the scene touched him, and suddenly he felt that deep, aching longing. You can hear this story firsthand in the amazing documentary made about his life called Beyond Narnia. Warning, tissues are a necessity for this doc.

C.S. Lewis is as we all know, the creator of the beloved world of Narnia. I cannot think of a more vivid example of a land that we all long to visit. The world of Narnia is almost surreal, it is beautiful, mysterious, exciting, but more than anything else, it is where one will find Aslan. Aslan is the clearest picture of Jesus I have ever see. He is frightening, he is magnificent, he is gentle, he is terrible, he is wise, he is silent, he is a roaring lion, he just is. And every time the children from England are away from him, or away from Narnia, they are longing to go back. They feel that is where they belong, they feel that they are not quite right unless they are in the place that feels like home.

In the end, in The Last Battle, all of the main characters die, and they go to a place that feels like Narnia. At first they are confused, what are they all doing here? But later in the book, Aslan explains to them that this is the real Narnia, that the place they were in before was but a shadow of the real land. He tells them that all that they loved best about the other Narnia, and about England, were actually just glimpses of the real Narnia. They are overjoyed, and all together they go further up and further in, meeting old friends and discovering all the things they love the most.

Glimpses of Eden. Whenever I get glimpses of Eden it is usually when I am enjoying something of this world that I love best. My family, beloved friends. Rays of sunshine, a gift of revelation about truth from the Lord. A bar of lovely, haunting music. People worshiping the Lord together. Gazing at a sunset, holding a child close, showing someone love. Watching a person's face light up when they are given hope, or joy.

It is when I experience these moments that I feel right, I feel that I belong, I feel like, if only for a moment, I am home.

And just think, if these wonderful things are just glimpses? Then what is the real thing like? I can't even imagine, and I cannot wait to return to Eden.

Resistance- Book Review

Synopsis- Could God ever love a half-blood all of society looks upon with such fear and disdain? Jace once believed so, but when a tragic loss shatters the only peace he’s ever known, his faith crumbles as the nagging doubts he’s tried to put behind him descend on his grieving heart. With them come the haunting memories of the bloodstained past he longs to forget, but can never escape. Taken from home at a young age and raised to serve the emperor, Kyrin Altair lives every day under a dangerous pretense of loyalty. After her unique observation skills and perfect memory place her into direct service to the emperor, Kyrin finds herself in further jeopardy as it becomes increasingly difficult to hide her belief in Elôm, the one true God. Following the emperor’s declaration to enforce the worship of false gods under the penalty of death, many lives are endangered. But there are those willing to risk everything to take a stand and offer aid to the persecuted. With their lives traveling paths they never could have imagined, Jace and Kyrin must fight to overcome their own fears and conflicts with society as they become part of the resistance.

This is the 8th book I've read written by Jaye L. Knight (a homeschool graduate), her other books being published under the pen name of Molly Evangeline. I have to say, I have enjoyed just about everything this author has put out, but this book blew me away. The beautiful thing about reading all of an author's works, starting with the earliest, is that you get to see the evolution of the author. Every consecutive book I read from Knight just gets better and better in both depth and writing style. 

Resistance is the first of a six-part series, and after reading this book, I cannot WAIT for the others! The foundation Knight is building for this epic saga is phenomenal. I fell deeply in love with all of the characters of this book, Kyrin and Jace particularly, and I have already developed my own hopes and fears as to their futures. I really appreciate how Knight made the two main characters feel so real. I loved them, I got angry with them, I cried with them, and I gave a sigh of relief whenever they escaped from danger. Some authors make it very difficult for me to connect with the main characters, and I end up loving a sideline character more. But not Knight, no this lady knows how to deliver a juicy character.

I cannot recommend this book enough, and I look forward to the next book in the series! Click here if you are interested in purchasing this fantastic novel; also, if you would like to read an interview with this amazing author there is a fantastic one on one of my favorite blogs here!

Inspirational Quotes- St. Augustine

Men go abroad to wonder at the height of mountains, at the huge waves of the sea, at the long courses of rivers, at the vast compass of the ocean, at the circular motion of the stars; and they pass by themselves without wondering.

I read this while I was doing a health course for high school this year. It made me stop and think, just how often have I paused to wonder? Have I completely forgotten what it is like to feel wonder at something so beautiful, so unique, so pure?

When I think of wonder I think of a young child who is just discovering the world for the first time. They are entranced by everything, the movement, the colors, the sounds, and the way things feel. The smallest thing holds them entranced.

I think our culture has grown very dull, lethargic, and well, too grown up when it comes to wonder. We have anything, and everything as soon as we want it. It takes something pretty huge to elicit a response. We have almost ceased to experience wonder at the daily "small" miracles that take place around and inside of us.

Well I, for one, am ready to experience that sweet kind of childlike wonder again. I want to see myself, God's highest creation, in a new light. We as humans are such an incredible miracle.

Stop for a moment today to contemplate just how truly wonderful you are. Not only are you incredibly beautiful, intelligent, and complex. But YOU, you are made in the image of the Creator Himself! And if that doesn't make you wonder, then nothing will.

Becoming Grace Part 3- My 16th Year

Part 1 of Becoming Grace was about being shown that I was the not being the person God intended me to be. Part 2 was about my major panic attack that left me feeling completely raw and helpless. I want to wrap up this series by sharing about the most recent year of my life. My 16th year.

I can remember being six and thinking that in just ten years I would be sixteen. Sixteen was a magical age, or so I thought. I would be old enough to wear makeup, go to big girl parties, wear stylish clothes, be beautiful, smart, and ready for anything! It would all be so wonderful!

I had gotten a little more practical after during the ten years that followed. Life had kicked me around a bit more, I had had some dreams die a very painful death, I had felt scared, sad, lonely. But I think as I lay in bed the last night as a fifteen year-old I still had a remnant of that feeling, that sixteen would be magical!

Well, like so many bubbles of false ideas, I had mine burst by reality.

I started my sophomore year of high school just two days after my major panic attack. It was really hard. I to like be prepared for the school year, but instead it felt like I had fallen into my new school year. Later that year my dad started a new job that meant he had a two hour commute each day. While being a good thing in the long run, this put a lot of strain on our family. In early spring we started looking for a place to live that was closer to where he worked.

We found a house at the end of April and had closed on the deal by the end of May. The next few months felt like a blur while we tried to maintain two houses. We had to deal with plumbing issues at the old house and a brown recluse problem at our new place. We moved in June 30th under very primitive conditions. July was spent making a lot of trips back and forth between both dwelling places. Later in August we had to put our sweet girl dog, Sonora, down after she came into contact with what was a potentially rabid skunk. In the midst of all of these we've had a lot of strife, internal struggling, stress, and tears.

I didn't write that whole paragraph to make people feel sorry for me, and I am not writing to whine about it. I am just stating the fact that this last year has been anything but magical. It has been a lot of sweat, late nights, fights, tears, fear, and the drudgery of everyday life.

Despite the many difficulties of this last year, I wouldn't trade it for anything.

During this past year, starting last September, I have experienced a kind of fellowship with my Father that I never want to let go of. Through all of my circumstances, personal struggles, and tears, my Father has reached down and grabbed a hold of me in a way I have rarely ever felt before. I have found peace in moments when before I felt chaos. I have found promises in the Bible that before were just some inspirational words on a page, but now they are promises for me! I have experienced a grace pouring from Him that is like no other.

I have experienced a radical change in some of the ways I see the world. I see life, beauty, and people in a whole new way.

Life is precious and wonderful not because it is always fun, or perfect, but because it is a gift from God and our chance to give something back to Him.

Beauty is something that God created because He is beautiful, and values beautiful things. When I am enjoying beauty, I am living out of that part of me that is made in His image.

People are God's highest creation, His masterpieces, His beloved ones. How His heart must ache when He sees the horrible things people can do to each other. How He must weep when His children are crying out in pain. How He must laugh for joy when He sees them smile, and share His love with others.

What I used to want to be when I grew up and what I want to be now are two different people. I used to want to be a hero. I wanted to be famous, someone people would know and be excited about. Someone who could help save the world. Someone who reached the thousands, millions.

But when I look at Jesus, I see Someone who touched people; and not just crowds, but individuals. Single, insignificant, ordinary people with their own pain, sin, scars, joys, and dreams.  He loved each individual as much as He did the entire group. And when He touched those individuals in their humanity, He started a revolution that is still effecting millions today. Including me, He touched me.

My name has become a large focus of mine for the first time over the last year. What "Grace" really means is something I never thought deeply about until now. God told my Mom to name me Grace because I would be a child of grace, mercy, and peace. I finally paid enough attention to realize that was not who I was and I needed Jesus' help to make me that person.

I now know what I want to be when I become an adult. And I know who I want to be until then. I want to be someone who people remember because I touched them. And not just the multitudes, but the individuals as well. I want them to remember me because I reached out, and they got to experience the redeeming grace of God. His redeeming grace through me, His Grace.

This is the entry I put in my spiritual journal the night before I turned 17. One year from the day that I turned that "magical" number 16.

"Lord, I dedicate this next year of my life to You. I pray that You will teach me, and lead me. Help me to see with Your eyes, hear with Your ears, speak with Your voice, feel with Your heart, and touch with Your hands. Lord, it is my desire to be a person who people remember being touched by. I want them to remember and love being touched by Grace; and by grace I speak not just of me, but of Your everlasting grace. I am Your Grace dear God, I have been saved by grace, and I desire to extend that same grace to the world. So here I am Lord, I am Your Grace. I love you Oh Holy One. Alleluia. In Jesus' Name, Amen."

I have so far to go, so much to learn, and many more mistakes to make. There will be moments where I revert back to being the person my flesh wants to be. But in my spirit, in the truest part of myself, I desire to be Grace. I now rejoice because I am finally on the road to Becoming Grace.