Inspirational Quotes- Tolkien/C.S.Lewis (Glimpses of Eden)

There are some authors out there that we all recognize as being masters of their craft. Quite obviously, C.S. Lewis and J.R.R. Tolkien are among the finest.

I have so many C.S. Lewis quotes that I adore, it would be hard to find a favorite. But I do have a favorite Tolkien quote (for now :)

We all long for Eden, and we are constantly glimpsing it; our whole nature at its best and least corrupted, its gentlest and most human, is still soaked with the sense of exile

 I read this quote and it instantly registered with me, I have felt this way before. Haven't you ever experienced a moment when you felt an aching longing? Where you felt like you caught a glimpse of a rare and beautiful treasure? Or perhaps you had a moment when you felt like you were given a glimpse into a beautiful kingdom where everything is brighter and more beautiful? I have been taken unawares by that feeling so many times, and whenever I feel it, I get a sense of deep longing for the place where I really belong. I don't even always consciously recognize it, all I know is, that for that moment, I truly know I am not of this world and I belong somewhere else.

C.S. Lewis, another master author and Tolkien's dear friend, described having this feeling as a child. He describes a moment in his childhood when he was staring down into a little fairy garden that his brother was showing him. Something about the way the light fell upon the scene touched him, and suddenly he felt that deep, aching longing. You can hear this story firsthand in the amazing documentary made about his life called Beyond Narnia. Warning, tissues are a necessity for this doc.

C.S. Lewis is as we all know, the creator of the beloved world of Narnia. I cannot think of a more vivid example of a land that we all long to visit. The world of Narnia is almost surreal, it is beautiful, mysterious, exciting, but more than anything else, it is where one will find Aslan. Aslan is the clearest picture of Jesus I have ever see. He is frightening, he is magnificent, he is gentle, he is terrible, he is wise, he is silent, he is a roaring lion, he just is. And every time the children from England are away from him, or away from Narnia, they are longing to go back. They feel that is where they belong, they feel that they are not quite right unless they are in the place that feels like home.

In the end, in The Last Battle, all of the main characters die, and they go to a place that feels like Narnia. At first they are confused, what are they all doing here? But later in the book, Aslan explains to them that this is the real Narnia, that the place they were in before was but a shadow of the real land. He tells them that all that they loved best about the other Narnia, and about England, were actually just glimpses of the real Narnia. They are overjoyed, and all together they go further up and further in, meeting old friends and discovering all the things they love the most.

Glimpses of Eden. Whenever I get glimpses of Eden it is usually when I am enjoying something of this world that I love best. My family, beloved friends. Rays of sunshine, a gift of revelation about truth from the Lord. A bar of lovely, haunting music. People worshiping the Lord together. Gazing at a sunset, holding a child close, showing someone love. Watching a person's face light up when they are given hope, or joy.

It is when I experience these moments that I feel right, I feel that I belong, I feel like, if only for a moment, I am home.

And just think, if these wonderful things are just glimpses? Then what is the real thing like? I can't even imagine, and I cannot wait to return to Eden.

Becoming Grace Part 3- My 16th Year

Part 1 of Becoming Grace was about being shown that I was the not being the person God intended me to be. Part 2 was about my major panic attack that left me feeling completely raw and helpless. I want to wrap up this series by sharing about the most recent year of my life. My 16th year.

I can remember being six and thinking that in just ten years I would be sixteen. Sixteen was a magical age, or so I thought. I would be old enough to wear makeup, go to big girl parties, wear stylish clothes, be beautiful, smart, and ready for anything! It would all be so wonderful!

I had gotten a little more practical after during the ten years that followed. Life had kicked me around a bit more, I had had some dreams die a very painful death, I had felt scared, sad, lonely. But I think as I lay in bed the last night as a fifteen year-old I still had a remnant of that feeling, that sixteen would be magical!

Well, like so many bubbles of false ideas, I had mine burst by reality.

I started my sophomore year of high school just two days after my major panic attack. It was really hard. I to like be prepared for the school year, but instead it felt like I had fallen into my new school year. Later that year my dad started a new job that meant he had a two hour commute each day. While being a good thing in the long run, this put a lot of strain on our family. In early spring we started looking for a place to live that was closer to where he worked.

We found a house at the end of April and had closed on the deal by the end of May. The next few months felt like a blur while we tried to maintain two houses. We had to deal with plumbing issues at the old house and a brown recluse problem at our new place. We moved in June 30th under very primitive conditions. July was spent making a lot of trips back and forth between both dwelling places. Later in August we had to put our sweet girl dog, Sonora, down after she came into contact with what was a potentially rabid skunk. In the midst of all of these we've had a lot of strife, internal struggling, stress, and tears.

I didn't write that whole paragraph to make people feel sorry for me, and I am not writing to whine about it. I am just stating the fact that this last year has been anything but magical. It has been a lot of sweat, late nights, fights, tears, fear, and the drudgery of everyday life.

Despite the many difficulties of this last year, I wouldn't trade it for anything.

During this past year, starting last September, I have experienced a kind of fellowship with my Father that I never want to let go of. Through all of my circumstances, personal struggles, and tears, my Father has reached down and grabbed a hold of me in a way I have rarely ever felt before. I have found peace in moments when before I felt chaos. I have found promises in the Bible that before were just some inspirational words on a page, but now they are promises for me! I have experienced a grace pouring from Him that is like no other.

I have experienced a radical change in some of the ways I see the world. I see life, beauty, and people in a whole new way.

Life is precious and wonderful not because it is always fun, or perfect, but because it is a gift from God and our chance to give something back to Him.

Beauty is something that God created because He is beautiful, and values beautiful things. When I am enjoying beauty, I am living out of that part of me that is made in His image.

People are God's highest creation, His masterpieces, His beloved ones. How His heart must ache when He sees the horrible things people can do to each other. How He must weep when His children are crying out in pain. How He must laugh for joy when He sees them smile, and share His love with others.

What I used to want to be when I grew up and what I want to be now are two different people. I used to want to be a hero. I wanted to be famous, someone people would know and be excited about. Someone who could help save the world. Someone who reached the thousands, millions.

But when I look at Jesus, I see Someone who touched people; and not just crowds, but individuals. Single, insignificant, ordinary people with their own pain, sin, scars, joys, and dreams.  He loved each individual as much as He did the entire group. And when He touched those individuals in their humanity, He started a revolution that is still effecting millions today. Including me, He touched me.

My name has become a large focus of mine for the first time over the last year. What "Grace" really means is something I never thought deeply about until now. God told my Mom to name me Grace because I would be a child of grace, mercy, and peace. I finally paid enough attention to realize that was not who I was and I needed Jesus' help to make me that person.

I now know what I want to be when I become an adult. And I know who I want to be until then. I want to be someone who people remember because I touched them. And not just the multitudes, but the individuals as well. I want them to remember me because I reached out, and they got to experience the redeeming grace of God. His redeeming grace through me, His Grace.

This is the entry I put in my spiritual journal the night before I turned 17. One year from the day that I turned that "magical" number 16.

"Lord, I dedicate this next year of my life to You. I pray that You will teach me, and lead me. Help me to see with Your eyes, hear with Your ears, speak with Your voice, feel with Your heart, and touch with Your hands. Lord, it is my desire to be a person who people remember being touched by. I want them to remember and love being touched by Grace; and by grace I speak not just of me, but of Your everlasting grace. I am Your Grace dear God, I have been saved by grace, and I desire to extend that same grace to the world. So here I am Lord, I am Your Grace. I love you Oh Holy One. Alleluia. In Jesus' Name, Amen."

I have so far to go, so much to learn, and many more mistakes to make. There will be moments where I revert back to being the person my flesh wants to be. But in my spirit, in the truest part of myself, I desire to be Grace. I now rejoice because I am finally on the road to Becoming Grace.